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Love Out Loud Or Not At All



I have been pretty quiet for awhile. Quieter than I expected to be given I had this idea to start writing and I generally love the topic.  But life has been something weird lately. Or at least feeling weird. 


Weird enough that I started second guessing a lot of things, and people in my life.  Questioning really.  And questioning didn't really make anything any clearer.  If anything it just showed me there were gapping holes in what I knew and it just set off alarm bells. 

Sometimes, it's that reminder that you always need to protect yourself and it's only ever going to be you.  And so I did. It makes my heart heavy and sad that this is the world we live in. 

2025 has been the hardest year to hold on to my faith.  Between things happening in the world, in my own church, and now my own life, I find myself asking where God is in all of this?

I can already hear the answer people would throw at me. God is who kept you safe. 
Are we really, ever safe when there is always something to watch out for?

Is this really enough anymore? For any of us? 
Why do we have to be kept safe in the first place?  Why can't people just not be shitty humans to each other?

I've recently learned a tough lesson in just how evil people can try to be, and now I understand why people lock down their inboxes. Telling people the only way they will interact is in the comments. 

I get it now. 
These are now words I live by. 

Some people are just out there looking for victims. 

I am usually the person that reminds people to look for joy, but 2025 is making joy feel like a luxury. 

Even less of a luxury than spoons, and those are few and far between lately. 

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